Or Maybe Not

Maybe, we were afraid of too many maybes,
the unknown.
Maybe, we were afraid that if we tried
things wouldn't fit
and we would end up with broken puzzle peices.
Maybe, we were mistaken that never trying
is better than trying, and failing.

I like Plans.

Why write words,

if no one is going to read them?

Why sing songs for no one to hear?

Why think thoughts and make plans,

if you never act on them?

Why say "I love you"

if you don't mean it?

You could never mean it.

I'm sorry but you don't know love is.

I miss dance :(

Beautiful.

Why is this so funny?

Merry almost Christmas.

Don't lose faith, dear.

You are lucky

You are blessed

You are fortunate for all you were given.

But you are not happy.

On Repeat.

I think I saw you in my sleep, darling
I think I saw you in my dreams you were
stitching up the seams on every broken promise
that your body couldn't keep.
I think I saw you in my sleep.

I wish I was her friend, too.

Favorite Song, 3 years.

Passed out on the overpass
Sunday best and broken glass
Broken down from the bikes and bars
Suspending like spirits over speeding cars
You and me were kings
over the parkway
tonight.
And tonight will go on forever while we
walk around this town like we own the streets
and stay awake through summer like we own the heat
Singing everybody wake up (wake up) its time to get down
(everybody wake up its time to get down)
And when I pass the bottle back to Pete
on the overpass tonight, I bet we laugh

I'm gonna stay eighteen forever (cut me open)
So we can stay like this forever (sun poisoned)
And we'll never miss a party (this offer stands forever)
cause we keep them going constantly
And we'll never have to listen (new haircut)
to anyone about anything (new bracelet)
cause its all been done and its all been said (eyeliner)
we're the coolest kids and we take what we can get (wait forever)

The hell out of this town
find some conversation.
The low fuel light's been on for days,
it doesn't mean anything.
I've got another 500 another 500 miles
before we shut this engine down,
we shut it down.

I'm gonna stay eighteen forever (cut me open)
so we can stay like this forever (sun poisoned)
And we'll never miss a party (this offer stands forever)
cause we'll keep them going constantly.
And we'll never have to listen (new haircut)
to anyone about anything (new bracelet)
cause its all been done and its all been said (eyeliner)
we're the coolest kids and we take what we can get (wait forever)

(you're just jealous cause I'm young and in love)
Eighteen forever
(your stomach's filled up but you're starved for conversation)
So we can stay like this forever
(you're spending all your nights growing old in your bed)
And we'll never miss a party
(and your tearing up your photos cause you wanna forget... its over)
cause we keep them going constantly
(you're just jealous cause I'm young and in love)
And we'll never have to listen
(your stomachs filled up but you're starved for conversation)
to anyone about anything cause its all been done
(you're spending all your nights growing old in your bed)
and it's all been said
(and your tearing up your photos cause you wanna forget... its over)
we're the coolest kids and we take what we can get

Just jealous cause we're young and in love
You're just jealous cause we're young and in love
You're just jealous cause we're young and in love
You're just jealous cause we're young and in love
You're just jealous cause we're young and in love
You're just jealous cause we're young and in love.

I'd like to be,

under the sea,

in an octopus' garden

with you.

How is this even real?

And when they come back for us

who will they take?

Will it be based on good behavior,

like God

or beauty

or intelligence

or completely random,

like most things seem to be?

In the world of the unknown

unseen unheard unspoken

is there a heaven?

Or is life itself heaven enough?

The One Thing You Never Understood

Let us make art

and get lost at night

and take the long way home,

just for fun.

Its all about the journey,

not the destination.

This I Miss

I need the smell of summer,
I need its noises in my ears.
If looks could really kill,
then my profession would be staring
please know we do this cause we care
not for the thrill.
-Brand New

Its amazing how different this year is.

I really feel disconnected from it all.
School
most of my friends
homework
ASB

I think I like it.

The Dreams

Last summer things got hazy and I ended up in a band...

Why don't you understand.
No means no.
I can't be more clear with this
and I was never direct.
Don't make things difficult.
Please
just
move
on.

It should be a big deal.

I should be happy.

Or at least feel something, right?

Growing up really isn't that important.

10 things

If I could say ten things to ten different people right now, I would say:

1. You creep me out
2. I am sad this is going to end
3. I miss you and I hope you miss me
4. Don't go crazy I love you
5. I sincerely miss your friendship but I know its gone forever
6. You are annoying
7. Don't leave me over break, I need you
8. I stalk you
9. I like you
10. You have no reason to be on this list.

My thoughts exactly

Thetruthisthatireallylikeyouandikindofstalkyouoccasionallybutnotinacreepywayjustinawaythatmeansicareandithinkyoucouldlikemetooifwegottoknoweachotherandyouarereallycuteandwhydoyoukeeplookingatmeihopeitsnotbecauseyouknowthatimcrazyiwishyoucouldhaveknownthisalotsoonerithinkyouarereallysmartandnotaquietkidapparentlyandiappreciateyourmusicandyourstyleandwellyou.

I know I would be happy.

Dirty city walls

sticky

graffitti.
Unwashed hair

clothes

feet.

Cold crisp air.

Warm sweaters.

Warm hands.
Apartment buildings up high.

Noise and glitter,

everywhere.

Good books to read.

Let's see the world together,

it's not too far away.

I'm sick of the same old thing.

Over and over

a daily cycle of sadness

I want something new
places I have never seen

people I will never meet

memories.

I want siginificance.

Truthfully

E v e r y t h i n g

means

n
o
t
h
i
n
g

to me these days

I'm not sure if I know you,

but I like the idea of who you are

and what we could be.

It's a crazy world, man.

I need this.
I need this.
I need this.
I will never have it.
I can't have what I want.

Ginger family

I wish I lived

in this gingerbread dream

with plastic reindeer and electric lights.

Nothing needs to be real.

I'd make this a simpler story

I was amazed at the colors and shapes you drew,
a paper cut for two.
-Manchester Orchestra

Silver Scales

And just as much as I drive you crazy,

you drive me crazy.

It isn't revenge.
It's equality.

So many notes we can't hear
so many colors we can't see.
I want to live in the eighth dimension

My Favorite Things

1. Kittens
2. Being warm
3. Water
4. Winter clothes
5. chai tea lattes
6. Friends
7. cute underwear
8. someone
9. laughing
10. writing
11. reading
12. racing
13. not seeing people i know
14. robot unicorn
15. the future
16. space
17. music
18. dance
19. things that smell nice
20. big jewelry
21. breakable things
22. art
23. secrets
24. sleeping
25. exploring new places
26. the cliffs
27. warm wind
28. egypt
29. nighttime
30. getting into college

This is not complete.

Golnar

You should make your room look like this !

LGFUAD

Do you believe you're missing out?

And that everything good is happening somewhere else?

But with nobody in your bed
the night's hard to get through.

-Brand New

Competition

There is nothing wrong with wanting to be happy. There is something wrong with wanting to be the happiest, to feel better than everyone else, even if it makes others feel bad.

Purgatory within

Wading in the lukewarm waters of apathy
neither able to feel the warmth of the sun
or the cold waters of depression.
It is a fog.
Unable to move
speak
breathe
think
talk
and most certainly not love.
It is pleasantly disguised indifference.
Hands stretch out
just out of reach.
White
lack of color
lack of anything and everything.
Try to swim away, they dare you.
You reflect on your lack of being.
You realize something is better than nothing
sink down, down into the blue.

I am not sure of anything anymore.
I wish I had one thing in my life
where I could say, that's it.
This is how it's supposed to be
but I don't.
I was caught creepin today.
I hope you don't know too much.

I love your hats

I love your face.

I hope you dont know,

at least not yet.

Everything looks better from far away

The Happiness of Childhood

As you grow older,

you realize that nothing that seemed important matters.

I wish everything was still important

and I believed in magic.

The world is so cold.

I wish

I always had so much to say, I guess I just never knew how to say it.

The Space between

Life is like one of those books

that let you make a decision at the end of each chapter.

The paths you go down sometime lead to dead ends,

or being in the same place where you started.
And usually, there is only one option

that will make you completely happy.

How are we supposed to know we are doing what will make us happy?

In life, there is no way to flip the pages back.

As much as it may suck,

I sometimes wish I had five chances at highschool.

To do list

I need more confidence.

In everything.

You are a girl who has it all.

We were not meant
to think or to love.

Sometimes those who mean the most, are those you will never know.

I Wonder

About alternate universes

and if there are people in the hallways of mirrors.

There is no way we are alone in this place

that we call the galaxy.

I wonder if they have seen us

and if the ones who never came back,

simply new too much.

The human race is far too stupid to be the best there is.

Man, I wish I was an alien.

If it's by air, I don't wanna know.

If we all don't take cover, then we're all gonna fall back in love again.

Maybe we were never meant to say hello.

A Word on Connor Oberst

I can think of no other explaination of how such talent exists. Every word you have ever written or sang- is true. Thank you for being the most honest, versatile, and relatable musician to ever exist. You are tortured, but can still make people happy. I don't know how you do it, but here's to you, Connor.

This is the first day of my life.

Moments Before Time Stands Still

We planted new seeds, beads of hope desperate to save the parched and cracked soil.
We said no to the corporations and men in the towers who sold our land in search of profit.
We stood and sat and slept on the highways, caravans of people stretched across the streets.
We whispered to the stars, and listened to stories of universes much like ours, that had been destroyed by greed.
We apologized for all harm we caused, we didn't know. We didn't know.
And in that moment we rose our hands to the sky, across the nation, united as one with the earth.

Why is life so much better when you learn to care less?

Basic Space

Happiness does not come from an excess or lack of something or another.
It is a distant place
that most cannot reach.
Smiling is not the same as being happy.
Skeletons could smile, if they wanted to.
Have you ever wanted something so much,
even though its impossible?

The man in the doorway

You make things quite difficult.

Would you rather

Which is worse: to be an empty person who seems happy or a happy person who seems empty?

Seasonal Regrets

This time of year reminds me of unspeakables.

Places I have never been

and will never be.

People I have never met

and will never speak to.

And the love I never had

and never will.

Its all in the wind.

The Collective

Who do you like?
"Everybody, nobody and somebody"

And the truth is

I believe because I can't stand the thought that there isn't someone who knows everything about the world, that we are actually alone.

Who I've Been

I'm sorry for everything I have done,

and will continue to do.

I couldn't change even if

I wanted to.

Maybe, we were never meant to know eachother.

Some things happen because they are supposed to happen.

We call this "Fate"

Maybe, some things happen that were never meant to be.

We call this "accidents"

I wish I had never accidentally ruined your life.

The science of reality

No matter how you define it,
I will still think that I am better than you.

Is that a bad thing?

Humanity was built to have hierarchy,

why try to fight it.

I never said I was at the top.

No ReGretzz

A Flair for the Obvious

You said that you're melodramatic.
I would quite agree with that statement.
There is so much that I like
or should like,
but it doesn't change the fact that I don't.

Nice shoes

"But really, all we want, and I speak for the entire human race, is contact. Someone to let us know that we aren't alone. That the world isn't a dream and you and I really are happening at the same time, even if it's not in the same place. That this is real. You're really there. I'm really here. We're real."